The past few years, I have made a playlist to honor Chester. But this year, the one I made was a bit different. I wanted to take every song that he ever wrote or contributed a large part of the song. Surprisingly, there aren't many. I know he probably worked on most songs with LP and Grey Daze and what not, but that doesn't mean that he wrote the song or contributed a lot to the song's form. Mike and Sean both wrote a lot for those bands while Chester wrote basically all of the songs for DBS and High Rise. Also, a lot of his guest spots were cover songs (stuff like Wonderful, System, Riders On The Storm, etc.) and Slow Ya Roll was already written by Young Buck and he just asked Chester to sing the part, same as Karma Killer, it was already written but Chester provided background vocals. Songs like Cry To Yourself or Walking Dead, he did actually contribute, even if the writing for Cry To Yourself was only an hour. LOL. Cross Off, he also contributed a lot. Anyways, here is my list. Took me a few months. I compiled quotes for it all.
Commit: Jonathan Krause talked about the song during an interview. He had this to say. ''Every once and a while, Chester would come in with an idea such as the song "Commit", which I love, and we would write something around that."
Sometimes: According to Jason Barnes, Chester wrote all the lyrics to this song. Chester revealed some info behind the lyrics during an interview. He had this to say. ''Basically, it's just about, I don't know, it's kind of self explanatory. It's just basically about somebody realizing that, you know, sometimes things just don't happen to work out the way you always plan them to work out. And it's kind of hard to think straight when that happens."
She Shines: According to Sean Dowdell, Chester wrote all the lyrics to the song. When questioned who the lyrics were about, Sean Dowdell had this to say. ''I think her name was Katie, but I am not sure if he meant it to be about her or not.''
B12: During an interview, Sean Dowdell gave some information about the song. He had this to say. "Chester wrote the lyrics to that when he was 12. It was his first lyrically complete song. Mace and I were screwing around with the music and Chester just came in and started singing the parts, it just fit. The chorus we couldn't find words to put there so Chester just started saying hooray hoorah and we loved it..."
Forever: Sean Dowdell had a brief statement about the song when it surfaced online in 2017. Taken from his Facebook page, he had this to say about the song. ''This was one of my favorite songs we ever wrote (as far as choruses go), but we never had the chance to record it in the studio. I think it is one of his most brilliant lyrical writings.''
Crawling: Chester spoke about the meaning behind the song during an interview in 2009. He had this to say. ''Crawling'', for example, is probably the most literal song lyrically I'd ever written for Linkin Park and that's about feeling like I had no control over myself in terms of drugs and alcohol.''
Cry To Yourself: Although the track was written in 2001, in was unknown to fans until 2004, when a rip of the song surfaced, which was also incomplete. In 2009, LPLive obtained the full version of the track. Fans starting asking questions about the origins of the track, and Chester said this when asked about the track on his Twitter page. "We never finished the song. I spent an hour writing and recording the track, it's basically a demo."
Somewhere I Belong: Info about the song was revealed in the Meteora booklet that came with the album. "Originally, this started out as a sample of Chester playing acoustic guitar. Mike took the sample, replayed it, effected it, flipped it backwards, and cut it up into four pieces, creating the main sample of the song.''
Hit The Floor: Info about the song was revealed in the Meteora booklet that came with the album. "The band wanted to make a heavy song with a hip hop bounce - this is what came out. Mike and Chester tried numerous singing-style choruses, but when Chester brought the screaming hook into the studio, everyone knew it was going to work.
Easier To Run: Info about the song was revealed in the Meteora booklet that came with the album. ''The verse lyrics emerged from a free-writing exercise performed by Chester: He wrote them to no music, no beat. Mike and Don liked them a lot, and the three guys decided that this was the song to work them into.''
Walking Dead: Z-Trip spoke about the track in depth during an interview. He had this to say. "The biggest point obviously with he and I — and this is something a lot of people don't know — but with that track in particular and the collaboration, he's from Phoenix, and I'm from Phoenix. So it was sort of like the whole vibe of two Phoenix guys, like getting down on a track...not just two Phoenix guys, but two Phoenix underdogs. There was a time when he was in a band, Grey Daze, and I was in my thing with Bombshelter, and it's like people were sort of... It was brewing. It could have went either way. People could have been like, 'Yeah, both of those guys suck, and they're going to fall off.' or 'They could have totally done well.' And we ended up doing well and it's sort of a testament to Phoenix guys doing good."
Walking In Circles: Chester revealed what the song was about during an interview with Rockline in 2009. He said the song was about ''not being a sheep in society, and having your own thoughts and your own views, and feeling separated from the rest of society because of this.'' It was mentioned all the way back in 2005 as a dirty, gritty type of song.
Into You: Into You was written about the experience that Chester had meeting and falling in love with Talinda. It has been talked about in depth in numerous interviews, but I can't seem to find the one I am looking for at the moment. I think it was either with Revolver Magazine in 2009 or perhaps even Blender Magazine in 2009.
Fire: The song originally had much different lyrics, but Chester ended up changing them for the final version. During an interview, he had this to say about the song. "That song took a few different lyrical changes. It started out one way that was really like a sad story using interesting metaphors and that’s where the name ‘Fire’ came from. The lyric that inspired the title was, ‘There’s a fire in our hearts that’s the reason why the tears keep falling, to put out the fires that our hearts are starting.’ That’s where it came from, but the melodies didn’t quite seem to fit. So I started over, and kind of just ran with that, and went with a more spiritual path of getting through the tougher times. Some people may look at that song and just say, ‘Oh he must have wrote that about someone who passed on.’ Or, ‘Wow that’s really sad.’ Or some people may see it as a spiritual thing, looking up at the heavens, and you know that there is something greater than yourself that’s with you all the time. This is probably one of those songs that is written with a Linkin Park sort of a touch, because it’s more open in general.'' - Chester
Morning After: Morning After was written by Chester sometime around 1996 but it never really went anywhere. At a few shows in 2001, Chester performed the song acoustically during Linkin Park shows. During one of those performances, he said ''This song is called The Morning After, it's a song I wrote about the anticipation of one day maybe making it in the music business.''
My Suffering: During an interview with SPIN in 2009, Chester had this to say about the meaning behind the song. “It’s literally about how being an alcoholic and a drug addict has paid off for me in many ways. I have been able to tap into all the negative things that can happen to me throughout my life by numbing myself to the pain so to speak and kind of being able to vent it through my music.'' - Chester
Let Down: Chester revealed the meaning behind the song during an interview with KROQ in 2009. He had this to say. ''Oh fuck, I'm getting divorced from this person that I hate, and she has all the money, all my stuff, and I'm living in a 700 square foot apartment and fucking, I think I'm falling in love, but I don't wanna repeat the same fucking thing over again, there's Let Down.'' - Chester
Give Me Your Name: The song was written by Chester as a song that him and Talinda could dance to at their wedding. He had this to say about the creation and meaning behind the song during an interview. ''Give Me Your Name was even further outside the box because it was a song my wife asked me to write for our wedding. She looked at me one day and said, ''You should write a song for our wedding that we can dance to''. As if that's so easy! Sure, honey. I've got that one right here. Obviously I'm not a love song kind of guy, but I looked inside myself and those words came out. Truthfully, it was never supposed to be for the record; it was only intended for our wedding. I had this acoustic riff I had been playing with that was very mellow and I was like, summon beautiful music in your mind. And it just came to me.'' - Chester
Crawl Back In: Chester revealed the meaning behind the song during an interview in 2009. He had this to say. “It’s a song about feeling as if I don’t have my own identity, and at the same time, feeling like you wish you were never born. That song came out of the despair you feel being addicted to something.” - Chester
Too Late: The song originally had more spiritual lyrics from Chester, but he ended up changing the lyrics for the final version of the song. He had this to say about the song during an interview. "I don't want to preach to anybody because I know that not everybody believes what I believe in. In "Too Late," there are times I feel like I want to be closer to God but wonder if I will ever be able to get there, because at times I've been so far down the other road. The reality is that I know in my heart that's completely ridiculous, because if I want that I can have it. Sometimes people lack the confidence to have that. That's what that song is about." - Chester
Inside Of Me: During an interview with KROQ in 2009, Chester had this to say about the meaning behind the song. ''Holy crap, I'm 600/700 miles away from my wife, all the time, and all I wanna do is get drunk and sit in my underwear in my hotel room. Ok, there's Inside Of Me.'' - Chester
Condemned: The song was described by Chester as really dark and really heavy during an interview with KUPD in 2009. During an interview with KROQ, Chester had this to say about what the song was about. ''Why do I like feeling like shit all the time? Ok, let's start writing about that, bam, there's Condemned.'' - Chester
End Of The World: The song has only been described once at a show in NYC as a ''good fuckin' rock song''. However, it originally had very different lyrics that seemed more personal and spiritual, like Too Late originally had, confirmed by Ryan Shuck on Facebook. Some of the early lyrics were ''Do you believe in life after death, without any pain or disease? Do you believe that faith is a test, the greatest truth can't be seen? Do you believe those who suffer are blessed, they know the true meaning of life?" Mike Shinoda also spoke in 2005 about a song that Chester showed him that reminded him of ''T-Rex''. Fans believe it was most likely this song.
In The Darkness: In The Darkness was written about Chester's romantic relationship with Talinda. Chester had this to say about the song. ''In The Darkness was more up my alley in that it was kind of a love song but it was dark and twisted at the same time. I don't know if anybody else finds it romantic, but when I sing 'I want to open my skin and pull you in,' I find it sexy, the idea of wanting somebody so badly that you want to become one with them; you want to inhabit their body and vice-versa. It was hard to open myself up in that way because I usually write about doom and gloom and 'poor me' shit."
Given Up: During an interview, Chester said that he wrote Given Up right after he got back from rehab. ‘’I’d just gotten back from rehab when I wrote that and the guys were like ‘this is fucking good, dude’.’’ They were letting me just vomit lyrics.’’ During a different interview, Chester spoke more about the song. He had this to say. "That song went through some different vocal ideas, I mean, most of the songs kinda went through like mass amounts of changes, and I think Given Up probably had like 20 different versions of it. It kinda started more, a little more punk with the vibe, and then we kinda like mellowed that out and gave it a little more melody in the verses and stuff. I was going for something like really heavy right off the bat, but the chorus came right away. And the bridge, you know, that was kinda, like, we got stuck at that point and Mike was like, you know, 'just kinda like say something that you would actually say,' you know, like, meaning like out of frustration or in that moment, you know, that the lyrics can relate to, like, 'what would you do?' And so I just started to going off, pretty much. And the 18 seconds scream was kinda like a joke at first but it ended up staying which is like, I always end up doing something during one of the records I wish I didn't. It's good, but, like, I wish I didn't do it cause I've had to perform it every night, you know? Crawling was my first experience with that cause the chorus is like one long note and then, you know, with this one 18 second scream which is not easy to do every night."
Shadow Of The Day: Chester spoke about the song during an interview in 2009. He had this to say. "There are moments during a Linkin Park session where I'll say, Hey, can we change this part? On Shadow of the Day, there is a guitar part that's at the end of the song. I walked into the studio, and Brad had been there two days straight. I said, How you're doing? He said, I can't do this. I can't break the code on this one. I said, Play it for me. I want to hear what you're working on. He played it and I go, I've got an idea. I go in the other room, played the part on the piano, and I go, Play this. He played it, and that's what we kept.''
In Pieces: The booklet that came with Minutes To Midnight first provided some info about the song. "This song began as a keyboard and beat loop, along with the staccato guitar in the second verse. In that early form, Chester put down a rough vocal, with words that came relatively effortlessly. The vocals that appeared in those early stages remained virtually unchanged throughout the growth of the song. As the song grew, it became obvious to the band that a special point of interest was needed in the bridge. On past albums, Brad had never been interested in doing guitar solos. With their encouragement, he dove head first into the bridge, creating a part that instantly energized the song." During an interview with Kerrang Magazine in 2007, Chester talked a bit about the inspiration behind the lyrics of the song, saying "I got divorced recently and that was very difficult. I also got remarried so there was a big contrast in my life. For a while I couldn’t be completely happy with the new life I was starting and I couldn’t end the last one. This is a song about all of that. The music has a kind of reggae vibe to it, almost. It’s really cool watching how the song goes from that, through pop and emerges as a full-on rock song at the end."
The Little Things Give You Away: During an interview with MTV, Chester spoke in depth about the meaning behind the song. He had this to say. "We were writing these harmonies before we went down to New Orleans on the first anniversary of the Katrina disaster. And when we were down there, we were talking to these people who lived in the Ninth Ward. One of the lines, about ’water gray, coming through the windows,’ was taken from what one older gentleman told me. The feeling I got down there was not a good one. For my whole life, I was spoon-fed what a great country this is, and I just didn’t get that feeling from that trip. I didn’t understand how we could spend $120 billion a year on killing people in other countries, but we only allocated $1 billion to rebuilding lives here. It really bothered me. … I felt sick about it. So I wrote the lyrics. Mike and I had a discussion, and he said, ’Why don’t you go write about Katrina?’ So I did … and I put it to the melody we had been working on, and it just fit perfectly."
Waiting For The End: During a Mike Shinoda show for his Post Traumatic tour, Mike spoke about the background of the song. He had this to say. "We were listening to the album version of this next song before the show and as we were listening to it we were kind of singing along a little bit and I was just really just enjoying the sound of Chester's voice on it. It's just so good. And I remember - this is actually the song, the way we do it here is a mashup so it's two different songs - but the first thing you'll hear is the Linkin Park song, and I remember what happened was when we were working on the song that this part that we play here was the track. That was the beat that I had made on my laptop and I had a cool rap verse over it that I really liked it, but it wasn't a song, it wasn't really the thing. And sometimes there were these moments. A lot of times he would bring me things and he would be like, you know, 'What do you think of this? What do you think of this?' And he was really deferring to me. He was waiting for me to say 'Oh yeah, that's the one, that's really good' And because a lot of times it was like I bring him stuff, I'd be like 'That's great,' you know. 'Sing it.' And once in a while he would bring something in that was really cool. I was playing the beat and he was like 'Oh man, I had this thing that I recorded the other day.' He pulls out his phone and he's flipping through little things that he recorded on his phone. And the moment he pressed play I was like 'Oh wow! That's the song!' Like 'That's what this song is missing!' And that's the beauty of when you're working with other friends, when you're working with other writers, other people who make music who come with something special and something magical. It wasn't even in the way necessarily that he sang it. Was just the idea of it. It was just so pure and so great."
Blackout: Mike explained during an interview that the track originally started as nothing but "Chester... screaming gibberish over the crazy dance-style track, and there were no words. And every time we tried to put words to it, the lyrics felt like too left-brained, we were thinking too hard and it didn’t feel like a gut spill to use Rick’s words." He told them to try automatic writing, a "technique he used with Johnny Cash and Neil Young, which basically means you get up on the mic and let the words flow. Going in there and actually doing it was terrifying at first but then the words just started coming out of nowhere, it was really surreal. It added a certain soul to the record and without that, I think it would have been really rigid and digital." Chester stated that "Blackout" was the hardest song to write off of the album. He did scat vocals (original melody by making sounds) and it was difficult to put words to it. The song was written in 3 parts, so they had to make sure they fit together. Jokingly, Chester also said that he regretted recording the song after realizing how hard it would be to perform the song live - he had the same thoughts about "Crawling" and ''Given Up''.
The Messenger: Chester said during an interview that the vocals of the song came to him immediately as he heard the first chords, which is rare for him. The opening lines of the demo were "You are a child with so many choices. The hardest always make us cry," which made Chester decide to write the song as a message to his kids.
Lies Greed Misery: Chester spoke about the background of the song during an interview. He had this to say. "This song was one of the rare kinds that just came out of nowhere. Mike told me to scream anything, just let out my anger and I did just that. Before we realized it, we had a song on our hands. In the beginning it seemed too pop, like a tune you could dance to. We had to take out the party vibe and add a darker ‘I’m enjoying your destruction’ element to it. I think this song represents the kind of emotions that arise from standing up to a bully, or when a tyrant is taken down and the people are celebrating around his grave. Like I said, it’s a really dark song, but it also has a weird ‘pizza party’ kind of feel to it. Maybe the combination of crazy style and symphony has something to do with that. You’re at a party outdoors, drinking margaritas, hanging with tanned people, maybe swimming… then you play this song. I mean, it is a party song after all. But that’s not all, you start screaming out loud. I hope you choke on your lies, swallow up your greed, suffer all alone in your misery. And well... it’s a terrible thing to say to someone. This song is incredibly complicated, mentally unstable maybe, but brilliant at the same time."
Victimized: Chester spoke about the background of the song during an interview. He had this to say. "This is one of these songs that Mike came in with this kick-ass beat and I loved it, it was like, it by the way felt really heavy, it felt in your face, it felt like metal but it didn’t feel predictable. It was so cool. And we looked at each other and we know exactly what the song needs. And so I think I started yelling something like “Fuck” or something over it, and we were sort of laughing about how funny it would be if that was like the chorus, and then I think it was Mike or maybe Brad, but someone in the band was like, “Just pick like one word, that could be like one really good word,” and I think someone threw out “victimized” and I was like, “That’s great.” And I just ran in the studio and just kind of screamed “victimized” over it. And then kind of the most obvious line to come after screaming victimized is “never again.” And then that was it. It was pretty much that simple. I mean that song kind of was done at that point in terms of what I needed to contribute to the song. And I think the verses are some of Mike’s best. I think the rapping on this record for Mike is the best that he’s ever done. I mean, there’s a swagger to his whole vibe and a confidence that I don’t think I’ve seen from him before. So I think that also adds to the heaviness of the song, too, the vibe that Mike is sending out. And so, but it’s a pretty complex (Indiscernible) track, and I really like it, it’s one of my favorites."
Out Of Time: During a track by track of the EP with Suicidegirls in 2013, Chester spoke in depth about the song. He had this to say. ''The message of the song is really: it's your choice to decide what kind of life you want to live because all this shit's going to happen anyways. And you can either be pissed about it, or you can find the positive things in it that help make you into a really good person. All the best times of our life didn't do anything for our personalities. That great birthday that you had when you were eight did nothing for you as a human being. What did it teach you? That you were the center of the universe and everyone should give you gifts? It's the time your girlfriend cheated on you the day you lost that job you had in that company that you helped create, or your dog gets hit by a car the same day that your wife tells you to go fuck yourself and then your kids never want to talk to you again. I mean, all these things happen to people. And for me, it's like I always try to ask the universe to help me see the good side of that shit, rather than the other side. Because the easy way to go is to be pissed. So that's what I think the song is about for me.''
Black Heart: During a track by track of the EP with Suicidegirls in 2013, Chester spoke in depth about the song. He had this to say. ''Loud rock & roll, that's what I was thinking. I want it to be loud, I wanted it to be rock & roll, I kind of wanted it to be sexy, and I kind of wanted it to be disturbing at the same time. That's what I was shooting for. It's funny because that was just a word that I kept hearing at first. I don't know if you ever watched those TV shows, like the Medium from New Jersey or whatever, where she like randomly sees somebody out of nowhere for no reason and she's feels a compulsive need to talk to them about something? Right? It's kind of like that with songs for me. It's like I hear a bunch of music, I hear a bunch of stuff...The melodies start coming and then I keep re-hearing words over and over again.''
Same On The Inside: During a track by track of the EP with Suicidegirls in 2013, Chester spoke in depth about the song. He had this to say. ''Yeah, another case of hearing something that stuck and then a story came out of it. I kept hearing the "when do we start pretending" part. I kept hearing that over and over and over again in my head before the words started coming. And I kept hearing "all the same on the inside ." What's interesting was originally the melody was supposed to start in a different place in the song. It was supposed to start after the opening riff finished. It's got that cool, dissolving riff, that first opening guitar part. On the downbeat of the next section was where I was supposed to start the verse in my mind. Well, one of the DeLeo brothers was like, "I think it will be cool if you started earlier before that happens." And so we literally just grabbed that take of that vocal and we just moved it back half a measure and started one full measure before the first music began and it stayed that way. By doing that, I think lyrically it kind of felt like that should be what the lyrics do as well. You're saying one thing, and then the catch phrases sounds like something positive, you know, "we're all the same on the inside." Like if you catch the end of the song, and you never heard it before, you'd probably be thinking, oh yeah, we're all the same, yay! Your brain's going to tell you to stop listening. But really, when you listen to the song, it's talking about not being happy and not finding what you want and not knowing what to say. It’s come on, admit it, we are not the fucking same. I’m nothing like you kind of thing. So yeah, it was a fun exercise lyrically to pull that off.’’
Cry Cry: During a track by track of the EP with Suicidegirls in 2013, Chester spoke in depth about the song. He had this to say. ''Sometimes when I write on my own, I kind of get right to the point, which is where working with Mike Shinoda comes in handy, because then he comes in, he's like, "Yeah, it's pretty on the nose, let's go this way." I'll say, OK, have fun doing that. Then he walks away with it and come back with something great. Or vice versa, what I do with some of the words that he writes or whatever. When you are by yourself, I've found that in the other bands that I've ever been in were I'm the singer and I'm writing the stuff, it was always just kind of like I show up and sing stuff. People are like, Oh, OK, cool, that's what you came up with. It's somewhere in between those two processes with STP. They kind of just let me do my thing to a certain degree, but then I know that if I don't let them know what I'm doing, they're going to be asking and want to hear it all the time. So I kind of find the balance between asking where should I go, as opposed to, what do you think of this melody, or whatever. So I kind of channeled Mike Shinoda in a little bit throughout this processes to have another voice criticizing my work...It was imagined Mike. I was summing up the Star Wars' version of Yoda after he died. You know, when he's just the green ghost shadow thing in the forest. I was doing that with Mike Shinoda. I was envisioning him as a Jedi master after becoming one with the force, and he would guide me. And it worked. I think that I wrote better lyrics because if it. I would go, "Mike would not like this," and so I'd rewrite it. And sometimes I would say, "Mike wouldn't like this, but I like it, so let's keep it."
Tomorrow: During a track by track of the EP with Suicidegirls in 2013, Chester spoke in depth about the song. He had this to say. ''Well, I do work a lot, so I'm alone a lot. When I'm on the road, I don't really get to spend time with people that I care to spend time with a lot. I'm with my band members, but it can get lonely out there sometimes. Yeah, so that's actually what the song's about. This song was a song that came out of the first couple of demos. It was actually writ ten in the studio as we were working on "Out of Time." Dean came up with that in the middle of the recording session one afternoon, and the next thing you know we're like hold everything, let's get this guitar down really quick, and now we have this super song. Then we finished working on "Out of Time" because we were on deadline, and then we got back to working on that song. We'd already figured out the melodies and stuff but not really words. So when we came back to writing the words, I knew the song was going to be about that last day before I go home, you know, when I've been gone four weeks or something like that. That always seems to be the longest time. Because the first week and a half on tour goes like lightning speed. Then it slows down to normal speed where a day is 24 hours instead of 15 minutes. And then that last day seems to drag on for like a week it feels like, and that's kind of the intent of the words...''
Keys To The Kingdom: According to Mike, revealed during a Twitter track by track of the album, Chester's vocals in the chorus were "stream-of-consciousness", as in Chester didn't write anything down. He simply sang what came to mind.
War: During a now deleted interview with ScuzzTV in 2014, Chester spoke about the song. He said that during the making of album, Mike had asked him if he had any punk sounding songs lying around that he wanted to bring in. Chester said he came up with War in about 5 minutes and brought it in to the band and they loved it.
Talking To Myself: Talking to Kerrang! about the song in 2017, Chester Bennington said, "It's about relating to how my wife must have felt when I was battling my demons. Seeing it going down and not being able to do something must have sucked." While Chester was not credited as a writer on the song, he must have written the lyrics or at least contributed in some way to the meaning behind the song, judging by his quote.
Heavy: The original version of the song was sung by Chester solely. However, as time went on, Mike thought that having another person singing on the song with Chester would be interesting. Joe came up with the idea of having a female vocalist guest on the song. Originally, Chester asked Julia Michaels, one of the writers on the song, if she wanted to sing on the song. She gave it a shot and recorded a version, which can briefly be heard during and LPTV episode, but she ultimately decided that she didn't want to feature on the song because she liked the original version better. The band then looked for other people to sing on the song. The band had met Kiiara through Zane Lowe and asked her if she wanted to sing on the song, she agreed, which became the final version. During an interview in 2017, Chester had this to say about the meaning behind the song. "When we were making the record, we would start the songs off with these really interesting conversations, and we'd all relate to them in different ways. There's always something in my head either going, 'What are you doing?' or just mocking me. Typically when I'm inside my head like that, that's when I find myself in a bad, heavy situation. My whole life, I've just felt a bit off. I find myself getting into these patterns of behavior and thought - especially when I'm stuck up here (points to head). I like to say that 'this is like a bad neighborhood, and I should not go walking alone.'" Julia Michaels also had this to say about the meaning behind the song, revealed during an interview. "He was like, 'I wanna write a song about how sometimes you get really weighed down by all your problems, and sometimes it's really hard to get out of that. I was like, yeah, let's do that. And we wrote the song in about two hours." Chester had writing credits on the song alongside Julia Michaels and Justin Tranter.
Halfway Right: In one of Chester's last interviews, he spoke about the meaning behind the song. He had this to say. “I was strung out on some really fucking heavy drugs and I was really young and I was driving my car and I blacked out. I woke up driving in a field, down a dirt road, in the middle of a farm. I didn’t know how I got there. It was crazy. I was remembering this constant fucking battle I have with myself, this constant cycle I couldn’t see at that time where these choices and these behaviors and where this journey would take me in my life. But when I was a guy in my 20s getting out of it, I didn’t realize I’d have these problems for my whole life. I didn’t think I’d be in one of the biggest bands in the world with a beautiful family at 41 going ‘Fuck, I could have easily have blacked out driving my car again two months ago’. It’s a dark song, it’s a reality check for me. The chorus is the insanity of my situation — ‘I scream at myself when there’s nobody else to fight”. It’s fucking crazy.” Chester had writing credits on the song alongside Ross Golan.
Cross Off: Chester wrote and recorded the song with Mark Morton in mid April of 2017, making it one of the last songs, if not the last song, that he personally contributed a large part to. Mark Morton said that he composed the base of the song and Chester added his own lyrics and ideas. Mark Morton spoke further about the song during an interview. He had this to say. ''Bennington and I both really loved the song from it's inception and everyone that worked on it put a lot of energy and emotion into it. I feel like you can really hear that in the track, and absolutely in Chester's performance.'' Mike also spoke about the song on his Twitter, saying this. ''I remember when Chester played this song for me in his car, almost finished. He was really happy with it.''