I don`t know who else I can write or express, everyone does not care.
In 2004, I first heard Linkin Park, they helped me so much, dragged me from the bottom, pulled me out of the depression, they saved me then and saved me now, but ..
This is my first passionate love.
But I'm tired of being alone, I'm tired of being nobody, I'm tired of that everyone giving a damn about me, I just can not deal with it all. When I talk about death, my relatives just laugh and don`t believe me. I had several attempts before, but always something was pulling me back into life. I was depressed for about 5 years, there were good moments, but most of the life is just hell. And only now, when everything began to improve, the news about Chester simply threw me back into this state.
Chester is dead and I don`t know how to live, I want to die, I'm going crazy.
I'm just tired of resisting and fighting the demons in my head.
To me it is madly hard. Chester saved me then from depression, but now he pushed me back ... I love him so much. I want to die, I just want to die, it broke me completely. My heart is broken into shards, I cry and repeat myself "why why why"
I don`t believe in that.
